Conquering our Fears


Fear. It is a very small word but for many of us, it takes up a disproportionate amount of weight in our lives. We are susceptible to fear because it was an important and useful element in our evolutionary history that kept us out of harm’s way. But its role in our modern world is different, where it is less likely that there is a tiger chasing us. As a result, our reflexive responses from our lizard brain tends to fire too often and too loudly. The result can be feeling constrained, and at times, overwhelmed, by our fears.

Being held back by our fears is not normal or healthy, but unfortunately it is a fact of life for so many of us. When we are held hostage by our fears it can be very difficult to feel happy, or achieve the goals we have set out for ourselves. If you are finding it difficult to accomplish something that you want to do or if you cannot make a needed change in your life, fear may be the culprit. Thankfully for all of us there are solutions to move past our fears. With courage, and through a process of analysis, we can get to the root of our fears and eliminate them.

Please review my seven steps below on how to conquer your fear, which I put together recently when I was dealing with needing to have a closed MRI done of my brain. My claustrophobia, which had always been in the background became a real concern as I prepared for this procedure. You may find it helpful to incorporate these into your life the next time an unnecessary fear has you by the throat.

It is well worth the effort to do conquer our fears. As a result, we feel less stress and anxiety. We are more present and feel more joy. We feel more empowered to make positive changes in our life. We have more freedom to enjoy our passions and fulfill our purpose here on this earth. 

7 Steps to Conquering Your Fear  

1.  Become aware of your fear when it comes up. We all know when we are feeling fearful, and each of us have our own unique ways of recognizing it. Some people feel it as a racing heart, sweaty palms, a sense of being off center, or a sick feeling in their stomach. Achieving awareness of what your body feels when it is afraid is the first step.

2.  Feel your feelings, even if they scare you. Only if you understand them can you get to the other side of them. Are you feeling frustrated, scared, angry, anxious, or depressed? Ask yourself why. Work through your feelings. Then, pivot to the opposite side and recognize what feels good to you. By doing what lights you up, you move towards joy, love, connection, inspiration, and excitement.

3.  Get clear on what the fear really is for you. Peel away the onion layers of your fear to get a deeper understanding of what’s in the center. In my case my fear of the closed MRI ended up being a fear of my own premature death. I recommend the help and support of a coach or therapist to assist in this process.

4.  Set an Intention to choose love every time your fear comes up. Step back from your situation to get a fresh perspective—if you are not dealing with a life and death issue, you are probably overthinking and over worrying.

5.  Establish a daily calming practice for a few minutes a day of living in the present through meditation, prayer or time in nature. Go to a happy place in your mind that gives you peace: a beach, garden, mountain, river, or waterfall.

6.  Visualize your Support team surrounding you. Feel the love they give you and receive it. You are safe and loved.

7.  Find Your Peace and Serenity. Let go of any fear and surrender to love.

By using these seven steps you can minimize the hold irrational fear has over you and maximize the joy and fulfillment that we all deserve.

You deserve it--This is your time!